#PrideOnThePage Day 8: You draw boundaries where your Self begins. A personal story of reclaiming voice, dignity, and space after decades of silence and survival.
So grateful your wise self came out of hiding. We cannot know what we have not observed, and had the chance to practice. It needs to be taught to all children. I envision soft pillows surrounding me that can morph into something more concrete if needed. They are so much easier for me to navigate around and with. Fewer bruises! Always a practice in progress for me. Thank you for sharing your experiences of them. Vital! Xo💜🪶
Joanie — I hear this image of yours clearly. Pillows that can shift as needed — a very alive way to meet what boundaries ask of us, moment to moment. Yes, they are practice, not perfection. And yes, how much would change if children were trusted with this understanding from the beginning. I’m glad you brought your image into this thread. It adds something real to this shared space.
Wow! This is so beautiful! As you can see by my name, I care deeply about creating healthy boundaries, healing and growing in happiness. This piece is amazing and I resonated with so much of what you said! Thank you!! 💙
Heartfelt Boundaries, I am especially humbled to read these appreciation and resonance my words created from you. I am so glad they spoke to you. Thank you for reading and answering.
This piece is so strong and profound. I can relate to every word of this. Being compliant. Not having boundaries because of suppression of the self. The power structures that need compliance. Your journey is very heartening. Claiming self, claiming boundaries, based on your own map, and noone else's. Thank you for sharing this.
Sunbeamdream, thank you for reading, for answering, for contemplating. The boundaries came, they needed be claimed. The self yes, claimed, after having been excavated. Its took me a whole year to go from feeling 1-2% of my true Self (as Self-Care, prioritising my health) too finally liberating the last bit of my Self by creating and sharing this video on January 3rd, 2025 https://wildlionessespride.substack.com/p/when-healing-means-losing-everything?r=1sss7q
The last passage, where you describe abiding, transferring your boundaries into life, in all of its facets is powerful. It begs you to think of boundaries not as inanimate but alive—through us. Brilliantly written.
Lady Libertea, yes, exactly that. Boundaries to me are alive, ever changing, evolve, more like waves or the tide. And never the same. The move around me, with me. Like an aura and yes when I revert back to an experience I had in a silent retreat, I think they indeed can be sensed and perceived from another body. We have this German saying “Rück mir nicht so sehr auf die Pelle” /Don't get on my nerves so much) what literally means, do not come closer to my skin. And thank you for the compliment, I take it as such coming from you and your own wonderful writing style.
I love this, Jay. There's so many ways I can relate. I am only learning the first steps towards boundaries. It's hard - there's opposition - so many just want me to fold into being what I was before but I can't. In other cases I just don't know where to begin and stumble through blindly. I suspect it will be a long process. So much to say, but not well enough to. I just wanted to say thanks. 🧡
Jane — you already see what many will not name: once you have glimpsed your own ground, folding back is no longer an option. The opposition comes exactly because you are no longer where you were placed before. This work—finding where to begin, stumbling, finding footing again—is the process. No need to rush it. No need to shape it into anything for others. You are here now, aware, walking forward with what is yours to walk. That is enough. My hint, embodiment for me, really made the difference in the end.
Jay
Fantastic title, it really drew me in. I have to come back to soak up all your words. I look forward and feel honored to come across your stack again.
So grateful your wise self came out of hiding. We cannot know what we have not observed, and had the chance to practice. It needs to be taught to all children. I envision soft pillows surrounding me that can morph into something more concrete if needed. They are so much easier for me to navigate around and with. Fewer bruises! Always a practice in progress for me. Thank you for sharing your experiences of them. Vital! Xo💜🪶
Joanie — I hear this image of yours clearly. Pillows that can shift as needed — a very alive way to meet what boundaries ask of us, moment to moment. Yes, they are practice, not perfection. And yes, how much would change if children were trusted with this understanding from the beginning. I’m glad you brought your image into this thread. It adds something real to this shared space.
Wow! This is so beautiful! As you can see by my name, I care deeply about creating healthy boundaries, healing and growing in happiness. This piece is amazing and I resonated with so much of what you said! Thank you!! 💙
Heartfelt Boundaries, I am especially humbled to read these appreciation and resonance my words created from you. I am so glad they spoke to you. Thank you for reading and answering.
This piece is so strong and profound. I can relate to every word of this. Being compliant. Not having boundaries because of suppression of the self. The power structures that need compliance. Your journey is very heartening. Claiming self, claiming boundaries, based on your own map, and noone else's. Thank you for sharing this.
Sunbeamdream, thank you for reading, for answering, for contemplating. The boundaries came, they needed be claimed. The self yes, claimed, after having been excavated. Its took me a whole year to go from feeling 1-2% of my true Self (as Self-Care, prioritising my health) too finally liberating the last bit of my Self by creating and sharing this video on January 3rd, 2025 https://wildlionessespride.substack.com/p/when-healing-means-losing-everything?r=1sss7q
The last passage, where you describe abiding, transferring your boundaries into life, in all of its facets is powerful. It begs you to think of boundaries not as inanimate but alive—through us. Brilliantly written.
Lady Libertea, yes, exactly that. Boundaries to me are alive, ever changing, evolve, more like waves or the tide. And never the same. The move around me, with me. Like an aura and yes when I revert back to an experience I had in a silent retreat, I think they indeed can be sensed and perceived from another body. We have this German saying “Rück mir nicht so sehr auf die Pelle” /Don't get on my nerves so much) what literally means, do not come closer to my skin. And thank you for the compliment, I take it as such coming from you and your own wonderful writing style.
I love this, Jay. There's so many ways I can relate. I am only learning the first steps towards boundaries. It's hard - there's opposition - so many just want me to fold into being what I was before but I can't. In other cases I just don't know where to begin and stumble through blindly. I suspect it will be a long process. So much to say, but not well enough to. I just wanted to say thanks. 🧡
Jane — you already see what many will not name: once you have glimpsed your own ground, folding back is no longer an option. The opposition comes exactly because you are no longer where you were placed before. This work—finding where to begin, stumbling, finding footing again—is the process. No need to rush it. No need to shape it into anything for others. You are here now, aware, walking forward with what is yours to walk. That is enough. My hint, embodiment for me, really made the difference in the end.
Beautiful 🕯️💕🦋🇨🇦
Thank you Cassandra.